Mockumentary script
Quinlan 1 (interviewer) : Hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of The Collector Guys. I am here with our first Star from Castle Hill, Tess. Welcome Tess.
Quinlan 2 (answerer): Oh, thank you very much for that flattering introduction
Quinlan 1: Before we properly begin this episode, I must say that you look quite familiar, something about the face, are you related to me in anyway? (says with a confused face and almost interrogating tone)
Quinlan 2: Ummm, I don't believe so, I have never seen you, must be a mistake (looking around in fear)
Quinlan 1: Okay, well moving don't worry about it, let's move on
Quinlan 1: How old are you and what is your collection
Quinlan 2: *cough* *cough* Umm, when was it okay to ask a woman her age (Quinlan 1 looking embarrassed), however, if you must ask, I'm 27, it's just the makeup that makes me look 8.
Quinlan 1: Okay, well umm... moving on, so about your collection umm... What exactly is it? (show videos of the collection after Quinlan 1 says "What exactly is it?")
Quinlan 2: Well, it's a collectables item --- (gets cut off)
Quinlan 1: You mean a collectibles toy
Quinlan 2: It is not a toy, it's a collectors item called Sylvanian familie-
Quinlan 1: toy
Quinlan 2: it's an ite---
Quinlan 1: toy
Quinlan 2: Oh, i've had it with you, (throws fist and halfway through shot, screen switches to technical difficulties)
Quinlan 1: (wearing band-aid on lip and eye patch) Well folks, we're back with Tess and we're moving on to the next question. (pause) What is the first and most expensive piece in your collection.
Quinlan 2: The cat family mansion is definitely the first piece I collected as I was so interested in the intricacy of the mansion, however it is also the most expensive piece I have in my collection.
Quinlan 1: Wow, how interesting, so how long have you actually had this collection.
Quinlan 2: I have had it for about 31/2 years and counting
Quinlan 1: So practically a bit less than half you life.
Quinlan 2: OMG, how many times do I have to say it, I'm not really 8 years old its just my MAKEUP!! (screams makeup and after throws another punch where halfway through it cuts out and goes to technical difficulties screen)
Quinlan 1: (comes back with arm sling and bandage around head) Okay... {mumbling words and stuttering, barely looking at Quinlan 2 because he's scared} umm... so, so, how umm do you view your collection, umm do you umm has it become an obsession so to say?
Quinlan 2: Well, I mean, I am proud of my collection because it is something that has amounted over the years and become a whole city in itself. 3 1/2 years ago when I was 4 and a hal-- I mean 23 and a half I was so obsessed with the collection and frankly so was my mother.
Quinlan 1: (looks directly into the camera) What is her problem? (looks back at Quinlan 2) Do you think think this collection has had a positive, negative or just a neutral effect on your life?
Quinlan 2: I think it has had positive effect on both my social life and personal life because my friends love to come over and play with them and personally, it keeps me occupied when I have nothing else to do.
Quinlan 1: Would you say you have become an obsessive collector regarding your (in quotation marks while looking at the camera) "collectors item" (looks back at collector)
Quinlan 2: When I was younger it was a somewhat obsessive addiction as I always wanted to get more to add to the collection. As I have said earlier, the fine detail within the collection interests me (and my mum) and frankly she didn't mind me getting more because it benefitted her also.
Quinlan 1: We have some b-roll here of the collection, it should be able to show you the intricate detail that goes into the collection of Sylvanian Families and how someone like Tess here can be so intrigued by collecting it.
(video plays for 5-10 seconds)
Quinlan 1: Now that we have seen the video of your collection, is there anything or anyone that has influenced your collection.
Quinlan 2: At first I was looking for something new to buy because I was so sick of my barbie dolls and plush toys, so i wanted to start a collection that combined my love of miniature items and roleplaying and I happened to come across Sylvanian Families which embodied both of those characteristics to collect and play with these items.
Unfortunately my love for the sylvanian families is starting to fade away, but that's what happens over time I guess.
Quinlan 1: Yes you are very right there Tess, I must say, you are quite wise for an eight, *cough* I mean 27 year old.
Quinlan 2: Thank you.
Quinlan 1: No, Thank YOU but, unfortunately folks that is all we have time for today, thank you to Tess for staring on the Collector guys, join us next week for Tom's mysterious collection.
Quinlan 1: I still can't get my head around why you look so familiar...
Quinlan 2: Yeah me neither (camera zooms in on her, she takes of hair extensions and hat, winks and video ends)
Quinlan 2 (answerer): Oh, thank you very much for that flattering introduction
Quinlan 1: Before we properly begin this episode, I must say that you look quite familiar, something about the face, are you related to me in anyway? (says with a confused face and almost interrogating tone)
Quinlan 2: Ummm, I don't believe so, I have never seen you, must be a mistake (looking around in fear)
Quinlan 1: Okay, well moving don't worry about it, let's move on
Quinlan 1: How old are you and what is your collection
Quinlan 2: *cough* *cough* Umm, when was it okay to ask a woman her age (Quinlan 1 looking embarrassed), however, if you must ask, I'm 27, it's just the makeup that makes me look 8.
Quinlan 1: Okay, well umm... moving on, so about your collection umm... What exactly is it? (show videos of the collection after Quinlan 1 says "What exactly is it?")
Quinlan 2: Well, it's a collectables item --- (gets cut off)
Quinlan 1: You mean a collectibles toy
Quinlan 2: It is not a toy, it's a collectors item called Sylvanian familie-
Quinlan 1: toy
Quinlan 2: it's an ite---
Quinlan 1: toy
Quinlan 2: Oh, i've had it with you, (throws fist and halfway through shot, screen switches to technical difficulties)
Quinlan 1: (wearing band-aid on lip and eye patch) Well folks, we're back with Tess and we're moving on to the next question. (pause) What is the first and most expensive piece in your collection.
Quinlan 2: The cat family mansion is definitely the first piece I collected as I was so interested in the intricacy of the mansion, however it is also the most expensive piece I have in my collection.
Quinlan 1: Wow, how interesting, so how long have you actually had this collection.
Quinlan 2: I have had it for about 31/2 years and counting
Quinlan 1: So practically a bit less than half you life.
Quinlan 2: OMG, how many times do I have to say it, I'm not really 8 years old its just my MAKEUP!! (screams makeup and after throws another punch where halfway through it cuts out and goes to technical difficulties screen)
Quinlan 1: (comes back with arm sling and bandage around head) Okay... {mumbling words and stuttering, barely looking at Quinlan 2 because he's scared} umm... so, so, how umm do you view your collection, umm do you umm has it become an obsession so to say?
Quinlan 2: Well, I mean, I am proud of my collection because it is something that has amounted over the years and become a whole city in itself. 3 1/2 years ago when I was 4 and a hal-- I mean 23 and a half I was so obsessed with the collection and frankly so was my mother.
Quinlan 1: (looks directly into the camera) What is her problem? (looks back at Quinlan 2) Do you think think this collection has had a positive, negative or just a neutral effect on your life?
Quinlan 2: I think it has had positive effect on both my social life and personal life because my friends love to come over and play with them and personally, it keeps me occupied when I have nothing else to do.
Quinlan 1: Would you say you have become an obsessive collector regarding your (in quotation marks while looking at the camera) "collectors item" (looks back at collector)
Quinlan 2: When I was younger it was a somewhat obsessive addiction as I always wanted to get more to add to the collection. As I have said earlier, the fine detail within the collection interests me (and my mum) and frankly she didn't mind me getting more because it benefitted her also.
Quinlan 1: We have some b-roll here of the collection, it should be able to show you the intricate detail that goes into the collection of Sylvanian Families and how someone like Tess here can be so intrigued by collecting it.
(video plays for 5-10 seconds)
Quinlan 1: Now that we have seen the video of your collection, is there anything or anyone that has influenced your collection.
Quinlan 2: At first I was looking for something new to buy because I was so sick of my barbie dolls and plush toys, so i wanted to start a collection that combined my love of miniature items and roleplaying and I happened to come across Sylvanian Families which embodied both of those characteristics to collect and play with these items.
Unfortunately my love for the sylvanian families is starting to fade away, but that's what happens over time I guess.
Quinlan 1: Yes you are very right there Tess, I must say, you are quite wise for an eight, *cough* I mean 27 year old.
Quinlan 2: Thank you.
Quinlan 1: No, Thank YOU but, unfortunately folks that is all we have time for today, thank you to Tess for staring on the Collector guys, join us next week for Tom's mysterious collection.
Quinlan 1: I still can't get my head around why you look so familiar...
Quinlan 2: Yeah me neither (camera zooms in on her, she takes of hair extensions and hat, winks and video ends)
Shot list included in the script - thoroughly planned.
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